Friday, 12 August 2011


Nancy: GMP, how can I help you?
Man, dressed in our municipal uniform: Hey. So I got this ticket (places warn out and faded ticket on the counter) the other week parking where I usually do my work for you guys. I wasn't driving my work vehicle, but I just parked in the same place out of habit. So anyway, I'm from the Road and Works department here and was hoping that there would be some kind of....I don't know..... internal leniency?  
Nancy: Sorry to disappoint, but even if you were doing work here for the municipality during working hours, we can't withdraw the ticket because you'd need a permit to work on the road. If you wanted to meet with a facilitator I can help you to book a meeting.
Man: Ahhhhhh, nawwwwh, that's okay. Truly, I already met with him and you know, was just seeing if you'd be any kinder or nicer about it.
Nancy: Ah, I'm sorry I wish I could help you. I know it's a pretty expensive fine.
Man: (Smiles and looks at me, almost beggingly. There is a long awkward pause).
Nancy: (smiling apologetically) Sorry.
Man: (perking up...) Oh no! That's okay! You're just doing your job, and hell, I parked in the wrong here you go...I'll pay on credit.
Nancy: Okay, so it's $75.00 (taking his credit card, swiping it and waiting for it to process)
Man: I guess I'll just have to withdraw this from my dwindling RRSP and then get the rest of it from a small savings account I made for my children's education. I guess they'll have to deal with the sacrifice same as me.
Nancy: (laughing) Ahhh yes, well, hopefully that's not the case.
Man: Oh, it is.
Man (taking out his wallet): Would you like to see a photo of them? They're very small and very cute.
Nancy: Ahhhh yes, I'm sure they are!
Man: Dimples and everything.'s the children that are suffering...just remember that.
(smiling as he leaves).

It's people like this that make up for this job's hang ups and hang-up calls...The voicemails today, by the way were:

Friday 2:45am: "___________"

Friday 2:51am: "_____________________________________________"

Friday 2:53am: "_____________________"

Friday: 2:56am: "Shh!______________________________"

Friday 3:03am: "___________"

Friday 3:04am: "___________crackles____________"

Friday 3:04 am "___________________________"

Friday 3:05am: "________________________________________________________"

Friday 3:05am: "__________"

Friday 3:07am: (hissing laughter, and I think I could make out the word 'sucker')

Friday 3:08am: "___________________________"

Friday 3:09:am "__________________________________"

Friday 3:09am "_________________________________________________________ "

Friday 3:09am " _________________________________________________________"

Friday 3:10am: "________________"

Friday 3:11am: "____________________________________"

Friday 3:12am: "a last hiss goodbye"

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