Wednesday 27 July 2011

Monday Morning Voicemails

Retreiving the voicemails from the weekend: If parking on the street overnight, callers are informed prior to their leaving a voicemail message that they must mention their license plate, their address and where they will park in a short sentence in their message so that the officers know what car they have and do not ticket them. Needless to say this guy probably got a ticket. 

3:04am - Sunday Morning

Mark, a probable Captain of the football team (19 years old): Heyyyyyyyy! (Hiccup/Burp amalgam). Wooooo! Excuuuuuusé MOI. Okay soo, I’ve gotta get my plate number here so I’m walking outside now. Oh wow it’s cold. Shit I should have brought a jacket. Kate! Kate! Come outside I have to call my car in to the Parking Department! Walk with me down the strieet.
Kate: WOOOOOOOOOOOO! Rob, Rawwwb, take this take this drunk this! Drink I mean! (LAUGHS). Hey Brian! BRIYYYAN come down here! Hey GUYS….Wer’re walking down the street to get his plate number. Come with!
Brian (and gang): jovial songs and yells.
Mark: Okay. Here we are.
*hear a kind of crack*, yells and "AWWWWS".
Mark: Ohh shit. Sorry I dropped my phone in the road. It’s okay it’;s okay. Dust it off. I’m okay. Shwing Shwing Shwing. Brand new. Okay sorry ‘bout that. I am on………..Fuck, guys, where are we right now?
Kate: Ummmmmmm, well this is Craig’s house right?……...call him!
Man: I can’t call him I’m on the phone you idiot! Sorry, sorry this is just going to take a minute. She’s just calling him to find out where we are. In the meantime, just wanted to let you all there know that my name is Mark and it is my MOTHER FUCKING BIRTHDAY TONIGHT! SOOOOO, DON'T GIVE ME A TICKET OR ELSE YOU'D BE A.....WELL....A MOTHER FUCKING ASSHOLE!
Group: YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (laughs) (Woooooos) & (whistles)
Kate: Okay SHhhhh Shhhhh SHhhh Guys Quiet okay, so: Craig said 1284, or wait..1248 I think Hailburry Crescent.
Mark: Okay so ANYWAY, here it is: Tonight I will be parked on 1842 Halle Berry Crescent. And my license plate number is
Group cuts him off: "WOOOOOO!!!!" Girl’s screaming voice: "I loooooooove yo-"
*hangsup*

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